On Stranger Tides - Tim Powers On the menu tonight: ON STRANGER TIDES

Amuse Bouche
This treasured bit of savory Pirate en Papillote will tantalize your taste buds: a choice cut of ole pirate lore and Caribbean history, spiced with traditional Creole seasonings, and glazed with a stringent sea salt reduction to further whet the appetite. Ahoy, diners, prepare yourself for a repast that is simultaneously light and fulfilling!

Appetizer
A tossed salad of varied delights: for the historian, we include historical greens as served during the actual time period on display – vignettes that are easily verified by a cursory search on Wikipedia; for the robust straight male, a hearty helping of derring-do, swordplay, vengeance, machismo, and chivalry; for those of the more faggy persuasion, we offer constant shirtlessness and the promise of much nocturnal shipmate “camaraderie”. Unfortunately for the gentler sex, this multi-course meal does not include the usual sampling of kick-ass female pirate; although this flavor is present (sparingly), we instead offer a blander side of helpless Rescue-Me-Please. Our regrets to our lady diners.

Entrée
Although the classic pirate bouillabaisse is often over-spiced to confusion, our delightful offering has been stripped down to allow the diner to discerningly inspect and consume the essence of each ingredient: the pure hero - a straightforward poached scallop; the pure heroine - a handful of simple white rice; the spicy villains - a vivid combination of Haitian crawfish, robust Andouille sausage, and most surprisingly, the traditionally bland English haddock, which we have flash-fried with – some may say – “sorcerous” spices, hitherto untasted by English gentry. Prepare your senses to be born again, and again, as each spoonful allows the diner to imagine how they may return to taste and re-taste this classic dish. Some have said that this meal inspires the rare individual to attempt to conquer Death, if only to return to this meal, forever and again. On this topic, our lips are sealed and our flavor profiles shall remain sacrosanct!

Dessert
For our last dish, we offer you this stunning and dramatic plate: a half-mad English sorcerer, reliving his days as a happily married man, furiously fucking the sand as he once again fulfills his wedding night duties, as all around him turn aside, aghast!

Wine Pairing
The vintage “Tim Powers” is a truly unique palate cleanser: it takes traditional historical figures and places them within the realm of the supernatural, all the while remaining true to their documented history. This fine wine takes the known and boldly combines it with the unknown: a marvelous feat!